Living (re)defined

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"my life is a perpetual question mark--my thirst for books, my observations of people, all tend to satisfy a great, overwhelming desire to know, to understand, to find an answer to a million questions. And gradually the answers are revealed, many things are explained, and above all, many things are given names and described, and my restlessness is subdued. Then I become an exclamatory person, clapping my hands to the immense surprises the world holds for me, and falling from one ecstasy into another. I have the habit of peeping and prying and listening and seeking--passionate curiosity and expectation. But I have also the habit of being surprised, the habit of being filled with wonder and satisfaction each time I stumble on some wondrous thing. The first habit could make me a philosopher or a cynic or perhaps a humorist. But the other habit destroys all the delicate foundations, and I find each day that I am still..."

"You live like this, sheltered, in a delicate world, and you believe you are living. Then you read a book...or you take a trip...and you discover that you are not living, that you are hibernating. The symptoms of hibernating are easily detectable: first, restlessness. The second symptom (when hibernating becomes dangerous and might degenerate into death): absence of pleasure. That is all. It appears like an innocuous illness. Monotony, boredom, death. Millions live like this (or die like this) without knowing it. They work in offices. They drive a car. They picnic with their families. They raise children. And then some shock treatment takes place, a person, a book, a song, and it awakens them and saves them from death. Some never awaken."  

~ Anias Nin

I try
not just try to live
but I try to live up
live up to the life..

Now (un)defined

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As I look behind, path filled with joy,
with experiences that graduated me to a man from a boy,
with little tragedy or guilt
with some clutter of past doubt.
As I try to look ahead into uncertain empty road
and my sight tries to envisions a future as it unfold
with the hope of strong & truth.
As I take the opportunities, the choices that befalls me
and I try to grab the chances that await me...

But I will plead, NOW
and leave the future to the future..

Idea or Reality?

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I wonder is it just me or we people fall in love with idea of things rather than reality of things. !?

Happiness (un)Defined

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I so much wish to understand happiness
the risks that come with it
the confused worry it brings
the uncertain fear of its departure
the mess it leaves behind
the temporary nature of it
the joy it creates in abundance
the love it makes me feel for myself



The great source of both the misery and disorders of human life, seems to arise from over-rating the difference between one permanent situation and another. Avarice over-rates the difference between poverty and riches: ambition, that between a private and a public station: vain-glory, that between obscurity and extensive reputation. The person under the influence of any of those extravagant passions, is not only miserable in his actual situation, but is often disposed to disturb the peace of society, in order to arrive at that which he so foolishly admires. The slightest observation, however, might satisfy him, that, in all the ordinary situations of human life, a well-disposed mind may be equally calm, equally cheerful, and equally contented. Some of those situations may, no doubt, deserve to be preferred to others: but none of them can deserve to be pursued with that passionate ardor which drives us to violate the rules either of prudence or of justice; or to corrupt the future tranquility of our minds, either by shame from the remembrance of our own folly, or by remorse from the horror of our own injustice. Wherever prudence does not direct, wherever justice does not permit, the attempt to change our situation, the man who does attempt it, plays at the most unequal of all games of hazard, and stakes every thing against scarce any thing... ~ Adam Smith

Pain (un)defined

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my thoughts silently scream for these tears.
my fingertips stuck to the keyboard to browse through our photos...
my eyes uncomfortably sown closed allowing no light..

there was little black spot on my sun past week
as she slits her skin to find freedom

its very devastating, painful, hard to take.
yet Life goes on and it must

moments (un)defined...

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I guess I could be really pissed off about what happened to me, but it's hard to stay mad when there's so much beauty in the world. Sometimes I feel like I'm seeing it all at once, and it's too much; my heart fills up like a balloon that's about to burst... And then I remember to relax, and stop trying to hold on to it, and then it flows through me like rain, and I can't feel anything but gratitude for every single moment of my stupid little life...You have no idea what I'm talking about, I'm sure. But don't worry... You will someday.

Disappointments (un)Defined

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If we are content then we will not be disappointed,
If we aspire & work to achieve it even then we might not be disappointed,
So only sure way towards disappointments is either;
We are content with something which we don’t like or
Our aspirations/expectations is beyond reality.

Does it make any sense?

inSanity...(re)Defined

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when you think things are going just as fine,
and wild winds chases away the sweet rain,
comes a time in every once life,
you wonder if you're sane.

Hopes make the world look gold,
or that is what I've been told.

Theres so many things in this life
That we can not explain

Funny how things fell in place
how inspite these transparent emotions
I managed to stay composed and serene
inside somehow there's this little light
when will it shine to blind you
of all these questions all I can answer is a smile :)
a mask that will hide what's true inside

alone (Un)Defined...

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When the day turns to night
there with your thoughts
your part of this fragile world
is settled into their own

Does your mind wander like mine?
Retrieving latent bits of broken dreams
Wondering what would have happened
if there was another path
Or would there have been a wall
to slam against till the pain
was unbearable, leading to
yet another sad parallel universe

But in that one, you die
not from violence or torture
unless one considers that
its self inflicted.

Alone is never so quiet when theres
no one to blame but 'YOU',
Laugh with the clowns
cry with the saints

Time is the only thing
that I know
because each step we take
Brings us closer to our end

Stars so bright in the sky
morning sun lights on the face as the dark sky fades away
moments frozen in time kept alive by every breathe
as another day You will survive

...You are alone until you don't reach out...

Choices (Un)Defined…

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Ayn Rand said.. Every wo/man builds his world in his/her own image. S/He has the power to choose, but no power to escape the necessity of choice. And I say, Life is not always about choice but about priorities and much of those may not be determined by you.

Life build with so many details of happenings,
the life itself continue to grow, to move,
moment of life begins to the time being, amazingly done
by the creator of life.
We move to the direction we make,
the choices and changes in life.

But there are
So many choices ahead of me
and so many I've made behind
Who am I trying to please here?
I don't know what I'm trying to find

and there are
So many problems in my head
I don't know what I want to do

But what clear is, the one making decisions here is definitely me.

We all make our own decisions
Our lives are based on the ones we choose
and we Lose when Choose the wrong.
so Dreams demand good choices

Change (Un)Defined...

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time or fate may separate almost everyone, friends, love,
as time passes by, things change with the time,
every moment, hour, day, month, and year,
all things have their turn to change with the time

Life, time, and events change with the years.
everyone, everything, have a time and day,
time to change, end, begin a new day,
Change is life, the course of life everyday..

Sense (un)Defined...

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Wisdom rules and mends a heart that falters.
and heals the mind of those who took time to stray!
these days require all eyes be open.
and assessments of others once entertained,

Everything we thought we knew,
and the time it took for us to know it.
is coming to an abrupt end.

take common sense,
and strap it on tight.
For safety purposes.
Do not flaunt it

Just know that we have it with us,
at all times for emergency use.

LIFE (un)Defined...

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Life is life
through all the ups, all the downs,
some will be there, some can't be found.
If they won't care as they should, so be it.
this is life in the way that I wish to see it.

Days come and go, true hearts stay close.
without happiness, love is an imitation at most.
you haven't stayed close, it's hard to love you,
this is life in a way that is sadly true.

to leave behind such a feeble mind,
forget it and pursue something real.
this is my goal, and in time...
this will be life and the way that I feel.

Life is life,
even though at times it's can tough,
you gotta live with it, even though it's rough.

It's a gift, given to us from up above,
so don't use it for hatred, but use it for love.

Life is the most precious, and valuable gift of all,
so don't throw it away, by jumping of a wall.

I know it myself, life can be hard,
so if your looking for help, just speak to God.

Life's of too great value to be thrown away,
so thank creator for letting you live – every single day.

You never know when your life will come to an end,
so live your life happily, get a family, and a best friend.

Live everyday as if it would be your last,
be kind, happy, and have a blast.